A bad date

Lisa meets her friend in their local café one Sunday morning. She had been out on a blind date the day before and her friend can’t wait to hear all the little details…

Friend: So? Was he cute?

Lisa: Yeah, he was. But that was the only good thing about him!

Friend: Seriously!? Why what happened?

Lisa: Well… He was waiting to meet me at the bar as planned. I recognised him because we had both arranged to be holding a yellow rose. I was quietly impressed so I went to greet him with a hug when he opened his arms out wide and said…

Hey! You know, once in a while someone amazingly beautiful comes along… Here I am!

Friend: No way! Bit full of himself then?

Lisa: I was flabbergasted! Instead of complimenting me he bigged himself up! I ended up shaking his hand and walking into the bar quietly.

Friend: But it got better after that?

Lisa: Sort of… We sat and chatted a while. I started to relax and so did he… He really did! Then he said we should move on to get some dinner. Truthfully, I thought he’d already eaten from the strange noises his body was making! But he said we should move on, in fact he said…

We’ve been sitting here so long my butt has fallen asleep!

I said – I know, I heard it snore a couple of times!!!

Friend: NOOOO! He must have felt really relaxed with you!!! Then what?

Lisa: He took me for dinner at that amazing Greek restaurant. The food was awesome, the atmosphere was charming and the topic went onto love. Things seemed to be taking a turn. Until he told me he loved whole heartedly, he took my hand into his and said…

Love me and I’ll move mountains to make you happy… Hurt me and I’ll drop those mountains on your head!

Friend: OMG! Is this guy for real? Creepy!!!

Lisa: I was shocked, just laughed it off. But, Yeah! Was starting to feel a bit weary.

Friend: So you called it a night? 

Lisa: I told him I had to visit my mum in the morning so couldn’t stay out late. So he acted like a true gentlemen and walked me home. 

Friend: At least he got something right.

Only thing is… we passed a tree and he pulled out a knife and started carving our initials on it! He actually thought I was into him! What I couldn’t understand is – Why would he bring a knife on our date???

Friend: But you got home safe, RIGHT???

Lisa: Yeah. He walked me to my door and I think he was waiting for a kiss. But obviously I didn’t! Then he complimented himself again! He said…

You know the best thing about me is that I’m a limited edition. There’s no other copies of me. And I’m all yours Baby!!!

Friend: Ewww! What a sleaze!

Lisa: I said ‘Bye’ as quick as I could and slammed the door shut!

Friend: Well good riddance to bad rubbish I say!

Lisa: I agree. But now he keeps calling me!

I wish there was an app to delete your number out of other people’s phones! I really need to use it!!!

 

pexels-photo-370984.jpeg

So, have you ever been on a bad date? What was the outcome?

Let’s share our dating experiences and hopefully prevent some future disasters!

Waiting to hear from you…

Suki… X

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41 Comments Add yours

  1. Anonymous says:

    Awesome post, a great laugh to start the day! Lol. I need that app too there’s loads of people I would like to delete my number from. 😬
    Keep up the writing your great. Your posts make me laugh when I need a laugh and your poetry is out of this world. Nice 1!

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Baffledmum says:

      Thank you! You’ve really made my day with this comment! It’s lovely to know my writing is appreciated, makes it all worth while. Hopefully I can keep it up… X

      Like

  2. UrsulaB says:

    Yep. Agree. You’re posts are so great! I however have given up after the last one started crying (literally) about his mom making him go shopping with her as a kid. I’m thinking therapy session or date? Run Forest RUN! 😨

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Anonymous says:

    Lol! Yes I need that app too! 😕 I’ve never been on a blind date I’m too precautious. Dating is bad enough even when you know the guy. I’m glad my dating days are over I’m happy married now. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Baffledmum says:

      I’m the same, thanx god! X

      Like

  4. mummyest2014 says:

    Half funny, half worrying! Sounds like stalker potential haha. Stories like this make me happy I’m married 🙂 x

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Baffledmum says:

      So true, I feel the same…x

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Haha, great story…i had a good laugh.. You totally made my day.. ♥

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Baffledmum says:

      Glad you enjoyed it. X

      Liked by 1 person

  6. sam basu says:

    Ha ha,it’s a funny one, indeed a bad date. Feel sorry for that poor girl.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Baffledmum says:

      Lol 😂 she’ll definitely be more choosy next time… X

      Liked by 1 person

  7. shoniessky says:

    lol good post, you always have the right amount of wit and humor

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Baffledmum says:

      Glad you enjoyed 😊

      Liked by 1 person

  8. This is hilarious, beautifully written post. 🌸

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Baffledmum says:

      Thank you for taking the time to read it… Glad you liked it 😊

      Liked by 1 person

  9. The kaby's says:

    Really Interesting Post….
    Just read in the starting of my Day….
    Great!!…

    Liked by 1 person

  10. For a moment I thought he was reading out lines from her shirt(maybe) 😂 Thankfully I did not have a bad date. 😋

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Baffledmum says:

      Fingers crossed for the future… 🤞

      Liked by 1 person

      1. For always🤞🙂

        Like

  11. Oh, this is a fantastic post, thank you! You’ve had me laughing out loud over here. I haven’t been on the dating scene in a long time, but if that’s what it looks like nowdays, I’m afraid!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Baffledmum says:

      😂 yes I’m very glad to be out of it aswel! X

      Liked by 1 person

  12. I’ve been enjoying your blog! Therefore, I wanted to let you know that I nominated you for the Sunshine Blogger Award. Congratulations!!!. It’s completely optional to take part, but can be a great way to promote you blog.😊😊

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Baffledmum says:

      Ahhh thank you for the nomination! & I’m glad your enjoying my blog, I follow yours too… X

      Like

      1. Your welcome😊😊

        Liked by 1 person

  13. Chris.Lemos says:

    Hahahah this was hilarious! Some guys have real ‘stalker’ potential, experienced that!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Baffledmum says:

      Oh dear! Maybe that’s the next blog idea – stalkers!!! X

      Liked by 1 person

  14. beckywill73 says:

    I enjoyed the postmade me laugh..i enjoy your stories

    Liked by 1 person

  15. This really made me giggle! Love your writing! 💗

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Baffledmum says:

      Thank you. Glad it made you giggle, that’s my job done! lol! X

      Like

  16. Lol hilarious:) I been on some blind dates. Gosh. I pretended I’m a nun (real one) in the beginning of the date. Sooooo bad it was😂😂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Baffledmum says:

      Lol! I can’t imagine, maybe you need to write a post about it??? 😆😂😭

      Liked by 1 person

      1. yes, I can always use it in one of the stories :))

        Liked by 1 person

  17. DQ says:

    It’s Hilarious. Had a good laugh early morning 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Shobha Iyer says:

    Hilarious…amusing post

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Baffledmum says:

      Glad it made you laugh!

      Liked by 1 person

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